SPARE PART

DADS feel surplus to requirements when at home with mum and the kids, according to a new survey.  Now that women have become more proficient at juggling motherhood with full and part-time work, dads are becoming less certain about their role within the family unit.  In fact, 66% of dads readily admit they no longer have any influence over meal times, health care, bedtime or daily routine for their children.  40% of dads REGRET agreeing to be the main breadwinner so their partner could be the main child carer.  A whopping 58% think mums get the better deal as they have forged a strong relationship and routine with the kids whilst dads work long hours.  And as a consequence, dads no longer feel they have an active and vital role in the upbringing of their own children.

Faye Mingo, spokeswoman for parenting club bounty.com, which commissioned the poll of 2,000 dads said:- "Economic circumstances, work pressures and the nature of family relationships have changed over the years.  Mums are increasing juggling more of these responsibilities which has led to dads feeling left out and confused about their role.  Society's lack of lack of recognition for dads’ contribution in bringing up children has also left them feeling confused about where they fit in family life. Yet they want to be involved and feel valued.  So called 'do-it-all' mums need to involve dads more and consider their needs as fathers, especially as nowadays most modern day dads are happy to share the responsibility of looking after the children."

Nearly half of dads resent the close relationship their partners have forged with the children – claiming their partner only had eyes for the baby the minute they were born.  33% of dads felt left out the minute their partner fell pregnant, because it was difficult for them to feel involved.  In fact, 55% willed the birth to arrive quickly so they could play an active part in parenthood.  But 40% of dads felt they had nothing to do after the baby was born, as mum dominated the feeding and sleeping patterns.

Faye Mingo, spokeswoman for Bounty.com said:- "Dads are left floundering during the pregnancy, and often as soon as the baby is born.  There can be a huge expectation about the work involved with a newborn, but actually in the early weeks the main care is focused on feeding and sleeping – something mum tends to take ownership for.  But just because Dads work it doesn’t mean they can’t share the night time routine, both to develop that special bond with baby and also to ensure both parents are well rested for the day ahead."

And once children become toddlers matters don’t improve – despite turning to dad for games and play, mum is still the one they want for comfort and advice.  The poll reveals that 69% of children who wake in the night call out for mum rather than dad.  And if they get out of bed in the night they are more likely to walk round to mum’s side of the bed than dads.  A further 62% of dads say their kids always run to mum for advice about school work, clothes, and food.  And when feeling poorly, 74% of children only want their mum for cuddles and reassurance.  As a result, half of dads claim to feel hurt and useless on the days they are at home with the children.

Faye Mingo continues:- "In most households mum has the final say day to day. She is the one who makes the main decisions about child care and is the one who is there when the children hurt themselves, cry, laugh or achieve something.  And whilst Dads want to be actively involved on their days off work, it's hard for mums to hand over the reins and let Dad do things his way.  Couples need to compromise on weekends; mums may need more help with the housework, but dads need to be given more control and feel involved with the children, which is why bounty.com now offers dads their own section on our site."

66% of dads admitted that deciding they should be the one to go out to work was a joint decision.  And a further 55% appreciate that if they had wanted to be a house husband, their partner would have happily let them.

SOUTHPORT COMMUNITY PAYBACK IN ACTION

GRAFFITI has been removed from walls and fences in the Southport, Marshside area, by previous offenders, as part of the Community Payback scheme.

Following a meeting with local Councillors on the Elswick Road car park, initiated by Cambridge Ward Police Community Support & Traffic Officer (PCSTO) Chris Ward, graffiti disclaimer forms were delivered to relevant houses to allow Sefton Council to remove the graffiti under the scheme.

PCSTO Ward commented:- “This is what can be achieved by taking a multi-agency approach to dealing with issues of anti-social behaviour. Work continues to identify those responsible for graffiti and arrests are expected shortly. More initiatives are planned for the area. I hope local residents will see the improvement this has made and continue to work with the Police, Councillors Sue McGuire, Carmel Preston and Tom Glover, the housing agencies and other agencies to build a safer stronger neighbourhood for all.”

Inspector Neil Moss of the Southport North East Neighbourhood continued:- “Chris is a very dedicated Officer and it is to his credit that this has been achieved. In addition to this environmental work other concerns in the area are being addressed. One arrest for criminal damage to property, and seizure of a scooter from a rider with no licence and no insurance have also taken place in the area within the last month. Residents should be assured that, with the help of the local community, the minority of individuals or families who cause issues in the area will be identified, and action will be taken against them.”

Residents of Cambridge & Meols wards are invited to have their say on deciding the Neighbourhood Policing Priorities for the next three months at the next Community Matters meeting.

This will be held at Stanley High School Sports College at 6.00PM on Tuesday, 26 May 2009.  

CALLING ALL WOMEN - YOUR LOCAL COUNCIL NEEDS YOU!

DO you want to have a say in the decisions that impact on your community? 

Do you want our local councils to better represent the needs of you and your family?

If the answer is yes, why not attend a free event to be held on Friday, 29 May 2009 at Liverpool Town Hall, to encourage more Black, Asian and minority ethnic (BAME) women to get involved as local councillors. This event is open to women from all over Liverpool.

Currently, across England our councils are not even close to being representative of their communities – only around 149 out of 19,617 councillors are BAME women. To fully reflect society the number would have to rise nearer to 1000.

Women interested in attending should register online at:- livegroup.co.uk/bame or call 0208 481 3375.

The event will be led by Cllr Mia Jones, member of the BAME Women Councillors Taskforce.

Cllr Mia Jones is part of the 16 member strong Taskforce, announced in May 2008 by Harriet Harman, Minister for Women and Equality.

Its aim is to encourage more BAME women to think positively about becoming local councilors. It is cross-party and includes councillors and former councillors from across Britain.