Relate follows in celeb footsteps with tips for bringing mindfulness to your relationship
MINDFULNESS is having a well deserved
moment in the media spotlight with celebrities such as Emma Watson, Goldie Hawn
and Gwyneth Paltrow swearing by it. The seemingly simple act of paying more
attention to the present moment has been shown to improve mental wellbeing and
is the theme of this year's Mental Health Awareness Week. But is it really that
easy?
Relate Cheshire & Merseyside believes many people could benefit from introducing
basic mindfulness exercises to their relationships and sex life, so has put
together some simple exercises to get started.
Relate counsellor Susie Woods explains what the fuss is all about:- "We
use mindfulness in sex therapy to help people experience more pleasure by being
able to relax and stay focused and present in the moment. Mindfulness can also
benefit our relationships as a whole by relieving stress, building intimacy and
enhancing inner peace. This in turn allows us to have more positive interactions
with our partners. The great thing about mindfulness is that there are plenty of
exercises you can practise at home, either on your own or with your partner. It
doesn't have to be a huge commitment; even starting with a few minutes each day
can help you to feel more connected. Don't worry if you feel self-conscious to
start with; it may take some time to get used to but you'll feel the benefits
once you get into it."
Susie Woods's 3 mindfulness exercises to enhance your relationship...
Focus on your breath
Set some time aside every day to focus on your breathing. It doesn't have to be
long to begin with; maybe start with just 5 minutes a day and work your way
up to 20.
A good way to start is on your own with no distractions. Close your eyes, relax
and start to become aware of how you're breathing. Breathe in slowly through
your nose and exhale through your mouth. Repeat this and gradually become aware
of sensations in your body. Recognise and welcome them and then allow those
thoughts to drift away to be replaced with other feelings as they arise. Notice
what you're experiencing and feeling. The aim is to let go: rather than reject
intrusive thoughts, just let them drift away.
Practise with your partner
Once you've practised the breathing exercise a few times on your own, why not
try this simple exercise with your partner? Sit facing and look into each
other's eyes. Breathe slowly in through your nose and exhale through your mouth
as before but this time synchronise your breathing. Do this for several minutes; it may feel a little strange at
1st, but stick with it and it can have
powerful results, increasing feelings of relaxation and intimacy.
Counting exercise
Find a quiet place and close your eyes. Now, in your mind, slowly count to ten.
Focus on each number as you come to it. Visualise it, then let it go. You'll
probably find that the 1st few times your mind wanders; when it does, just go
back to number one and start again. Gradually you'll be able to build up to 10
without interruptions and feel you've created a calm space in your busy day.
Relate Cheshire and Merseyside offers information, advice and counselling for all
stages of your relationships, including counselling for couples and sex therapy.
Call us on:- 0300 330 5793 or visit:-
relatecm.org.uk for more information.
